It’s time again to circle back around to The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien. Here were my favorite monologue jokes and bits from last night’s episode:

Yesterday an American won the New York Marathon for the first time in twenty-seven years. Yeah, the American’s victory was the result of hard work, rigorous training and the fact that we told Kenya the race was next Sunday.

Then there was this:

The Chicago Cubs are the first Major League team now to have an openly gay owner. That means if the Cubs ever win a World Series that’s going to be one helluva parade.

A new survey found that ten percent of male students at MIT have had a homosexual encounter. And the other ninety percent of men at MIT have had no kind of sexual encounter.

In Orlando a man was arrested for carrying a loaded gun into Disneyworld. Or, as the man referred to it, his Extremely Fast Pass.

Then there was this:

And this:

The desk segment was the ever-popular Celebrity Survey. As usual it was pretty hilarious. They didn’t make a clip of it, however, so I can’t share the hilarity with you. Sorry.

Ewan McGregor was the first couch guest. Holy cow is he good looking. Seriously. I have no problem telling you that he is a handsome dude. Plus he’s got that English accent thing going on. The interview was great, but I might be a little bias. Here’s the first part of the interview:

And the second half of the interview is even better:

Shaun White was the second couch guest. Shaun is an Olympic gold medalist in snowboarding. I know I’ve already got 100 clips in today’s post, but the interview was really good, so I gotta show it:

Tegan and Sara was the musical guest. They were really good.

Great show. I give it my highest rating:

- Woody