The Late Night with Jimmy Fallon studio is decked out for the holidays, in case you were wondering. Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s episode:

Speaking of Tiger, on Friday he admitted to infidelity on his website, and announced that after much soul searching he would take an indefinite break from professional golf. It’s gotta be hard for Tiger to give up golf, it’s like his second favorite thing to do.

If anyone is looking for a Christmas gift idea there’s a new game for the Xbox 360. It’s called Don’t Be Nervous Talking to Girls. It teaches guys how to chat with the ladies. The challenge is talking to a pretty girl while trying to control your joystick. My favorite pickup line is, “Hey sweetheart, A, B, A, B, left trigger, A, A, B, B.”

This is ridiculous; scientists in Japan have created a new microwave that plays YouTube videos while you wait for your food to cook. Yeah, the most popular microwave video is Two Girls, One Cup…of Noodles.

Researchers at NYU have discovered a new technique that can erase bad memories and fear in humans, it’s called whiskey.

There were three holiday-related desk segments. They were all good, but my favorite was the Late Night Timeline: Barack’s Holiday Interview Edition. It’s goofy, but it got some big chuckles out of me:

Kate Hudson was the first couch guest. She’s in the new movie Nine. I think Kate is a pretty decent actress and I’ve enjoyed her films. Overall the interview was really good. Kate had tremendous energy that made her a lot of fun to watch. In addition, she and Jimmy are old friends, so they’re chemistry together worked really well. Here’s a good example of it. You just need to watch the first minute:

Giovanni Ribisi was the second couch guest. He is in the new movie Avatar. I think Giovanni is a great actor and have really enjoyed everything he’s been in, both in film and on television. Watching this interview cemented my thought that Giovanni is pretty cool and the kind of guy who would be fun to have a long conversation with about any and all subjects. The interview was too short in my opinion; I wish he and Jimmy had had more time to chat. Here’s a clip:

Chevelle was the musical guest. They gave a rocking performance.

Good show. I give it:

- Woody

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Late Show with David Letterman:

Nice day outside. Beautiful day all up and down the East Coast. It was so nice down in Washington that President Obama was out on the White House lawn making a kite out of his birth certificate.

So, we found the President’s birth certificate. It’s on to Bin Laden.

How about that Lindsey Lohan? She’s going to the slammer. Gonna be in there for 120 days. But don’t worry, they already got the Taliban guys digging her a tunnel.

How about that Donald Trump? He’s in New Hampshire testing the waters to see if the country is ready for a loud-mouth oaf.

According to a recent poll 50% of Americans think that Donald Trump would make a terrible president. The other 50% think he would make an awful president.

The desk segment included Top Ten Surprises on Barack Obama’s Birth Certificate:

Kate Hudson was the first couch guest. She stars in the new film Something Borrowed. The interview was pretty good. She is seriously pregnant, so I found it amazing that not only did she fly out, get dressed up and agree to be on the show, but she still had energy left to laugh and have fun with Dave. If it had been me I would have just stayed home wondering how the hell I got pregnant. Anyhoo, here’s a clip:

Rich Eisen was the second couch guest. He is the lead host of the NFL Network. Rich and Letterman discussed the NFL draft and the controversy between the NFL players and owners. Despite the fact that I don’t care too much about either, I still enjoyed the interview. I think it’s for the same reason that I enjoyed the Kate Hudson interview. Rich was personable, funny and had good banter with Letterman. Here’s a clip:

Emmylou Harris was the musical guest. She was fine.

A good all-around show. I give it:

- Ben