I know I’ve been doing a lot of Conan reviews lately, but he’s in New York this week, and that’s totally worth watching. Plus, Jimmy Fallon was his guest, so it’s like watching two late-night shows at once.

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s show:

Thank you very much. Good God, I have not heard applause like that since I announced I was leaving New York.

Happy Halloween everybody. I see a lot of Conan costumes. Hey, at least you can take yours off.

I gotta just take a second and apologize. TBS went a little crazy advertising my week here in the city. It’s sickening. It’s everywhere. I hope you don’t mind seeing my face on all the bus stops. And I can assure you, the penises weren’t there when we put them up. But man, you people can draw.

The desk segments were visiting former co-workers, NY vs. LA Building Battle and the NYC Citizenship Test. They were all ok, but none were anywhere near as funny as the video during the monologue of him delivering Chinese food. If you haven’t watched that yet I strongly encourage you to do so immediately.

Done? Ok, I guess the NYC Citizenship Test is worth posting:

Jimmy Fallon was the first couch guest. He is the host of Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. The interview was pretty good. There was a lot of energy and a lot of laughs. It’s worth watching:

Reggie Watts was the stand-up comedian. He was ok.

Great show. It’s clear to me that Conan should stay in New York, it’s where he was meant to be. I give it:

- Woody

Here were my favorite monologue jokes from last night’s Conan.

So great to be back in New York City. So much has changed since we left. A lots changed , though, I just learned you can no longer drive through Times Square. I’ve also learned you can no longer assume any woman in Times Square is a prostitute. My apologies to the librarian from Akron, Ohio. [Woman in the audience screams] Oh, she’s here!

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie wants to extend the 7 train into New Jersey. Yeah, when asked what’s wrong with the Lincoln Tunnel Christie said, “You try squeezing through that thing.”

A California woman is suing Justin Bieber, cause she claims he is the father of her three month-old love child. People who have seen the baby say he looks exactly like Justin, except older.

The desk segment was a visit from a Ted Turner impersonator and Conan making New York style pizza. Guess which one was funny (hint: it was also yummy):

Matthew Broderick was the first couch guest. He’s in the new film Tower Heist. I’ve like Matthew a lot and think he’s a very talented actor, but this interview was kinda boring. Matthew was very mellow, and it really didn’t mix with the high-level of energy Conan had been running for the first half of the show.

Paul Simon was the musical guest. It was nice to hear a new song from him.

Very good show. I give it:

- Woody